step one: do nothing
as the flight attendances take their break in the baggage
hold playing dice games
the pilot performs stand-up in first class and the last
green olive on earth swims
in his
very dry
mar
tin
i
meanwhile
the strike-ready snake will not hesitate
the headlights of the tracker-trailer will not blink
political pundits scream theater in a crowded fire
and all
the hamsters trade their hamster wheels for happy meals
the inflight meal was a can of worms
the inflight movie was a documentary on the opiate effects
of inflight movies
meanwhile
all the corporate risk managers travelling to the annual security
convention
block the emergency doors wearing parachutes half-eaten
from last year’s
plague
of miller
moths
international flights are blessed with 5-cents-worth of
peanuts wrapped in 6-cents-worth
of plastic, and zucker brother movie marathons “what’s your
clearance clarence?”
“surely you can’t
be serious” “i am serious, and don’t call me shirley”
that’s first
class stand-up right there
meanwhile
all the doctor’s doctor their doctrines of the dying
patient’s last rite to righteousness
(righteousness
(noun) ((?)) a highly volatile substance manufactured
in the mind, dirty burning no
alternative always blowing up in someone’s face)
meanwhile
a mountain looms
big
purple
majestic
with big purple arms open wide beckoning, come to daddy
come to gravity, drop your f bombs over denver and set your
engines
on fire
hurry back home
big dumb rock, star-dust recycler, big blue oxygen tank,
also a mother
scolding us: if you can’t solve your problems yourself, then
i will
solve
them
for you
which is great news for the cockroach who dreams of opposable
thumbs
step two:
as we make our final approach, please note the “woot-woot” sign
has been turned on